It had been exactly thirteen days and five hours since I moved to my new house, and I needed to go to the grocery store. Our kitchen is still under construction, I am not doing much cooking. Friends of ours were picking up take-out at my father-in-law's restaurant for our Friday night Shabbat dinner, but I still needed things.
I feel antsy and anxious when my kitchen, even my makeshift dining room kitchen consisting of a single burner, a crock pot and a refrigerator, isn't stocked. Cooking is how I relax, how I nurture, and how I show my love for the people in my life, and not being able to work my kitchen magic has been really difficult for me. I thought a trip to the grocery store might be the best medicine. I may not have a fully functioning kitchen yet, but by god I would do the best I could with what I had.
So at nine o'clock this past Thursday night I found myself pushing a cart up and down the aisles of Shop Rite. I had heard that this was the best grocery store in the area. The one with the best prices, produce and products. Sign me up.
For half an hour I just browsed around, getting the lay of the land. After seven years shopping in Manhattan grocery stores, I could hardly believe how big everything was. When I saw someone approaching with a cart from the other direction, I instinctively moved my cart as far to the right as I could to let her pass by, only to realize that in these suburban grocery aisles, two, or even three, carts could fit down an aisle with room to spare. That, in itself was practically a miracle.
When I got everything on my list, I headed towards the check-out line thrilled with myself, with this grocery store, with my new town, and with life in general. As I got in line, I realized that I had forgotten the cheese. No big deal. I turned my cart around and headed to the back of the store where I thought the dairy section would be. But I found case after case of chicken instead.
I walked up and down a few aisles, fully expecting to see dairy in each one, only to be faced with shelves filled with every product imaginable except for the ones I needed. Up and down the aisles I went, growing more frustrated with each turn.
What kind of grocery store is it where the cheese is nowhere to be found? I thought, longing for the familiarity of my tiny NYC grocery store where I always knew where the cheese would be.
Do people in White Plains not eat cheese?
What if there is no cheese?
How can I make anything without cheese?
I wonder if the other grocery store has cheese.
Maybe I should bring cheese back from Manhattan after work tomorrow.
WHERE THE HELL IS THE GOD DAMNED CHEESE?
I'm never coming back here again.
And then I saw it. A cart, pushed by a woman a little older than I, with cheese. I asked her where the cheese was, and she pointed towards the back corner of the store.
And there it was.
When I got home, my husband asked me how the grocery store was.
"It was great," I said.
No need to mention anything about the cheese.
When I got everything on my list, I headed towards the check-out line thrilled with myself, with this grocery store, with my new town, and with life in general. As I got in line, I realized that I had forgotten the cheese. No big deal. I turned my cart around and headed to the back of the store where I thought the dairy section would be. But I found case after case of chicken instead.
I walked up and down a few aisles, fully expecting to see dairy in each one, only to be faced with shelves filled with every product imaginable except for the ones I needed. Up and down the aisles I went, growing more frustrated with each turn.
What kind of grocery store is it where the cheese is nowhere to be found? I thought, longing for the familiarity of my tiny NYC grocery store where I always knew where the cheese would be.
Do people in White Plains not eat cheese?
What if there is no cheese?
How can I make anything without cheese?
I wonder if the other grocery store has cheese.
Maybe I should bring cheese back from Manhattan after work tomorrow.
WHERE THE HELL IS THE GOD DAMNED CHEESE?
I'm never coming back here again.
And then I saw it. A cart, pushed by a woman a little older than I, with cheese. I asked her where the cheese was, and she pointed towards the back corner of the store.
And there it was.
When I got home, my husband asked me how the grocery store was.
"It was great," I said.
No need to mention anything about the cheese.
Glad you found the cheese! That's why I like stores like Target where they are arranged the same no matter where in the country you are!
ReplyDeletePS Thanks for nixing the captcha!
It's the little differences that make moving such a big deal. I hope your kitchen gets up and running soon!
ReplyDeleteI have a secret affinity for getting lost in unfamiliar grocery stores. I'm weird that way..
ReplyDeleteGlad you found the cheese! Bet it looks awesome in your new fridge. It's the perfect accessory!
Maybe I am weird, but I kind of like wandering through new stores, never know what you are going to find.
ReplyDeleteMy daughter gave me a hard time the other day because we didn't cook for Shabbos. I made a point to explain to her a good meal is only special when shared by special people.
Haha! This reminds me of my first time shopping in South Korea, except that time, I couldn't even find the food! lol The store was huge, and it was like a WalMart type place with all manner of clothing, electronics, etc. I knew food was somewhere, but it took wandering around all 5 STORIES before I found it.
ReplyDeletethis is funny! i so remember when i moved to the suburbs from the city - i wanted to live in the supermarket here. coming those cramped aisles that i had gotten used to, this place was like disney world. i thought there should be a hotel behind it. yes, i was in love - and i couldn't find a thing. :)
ReplyDeleteLove this! You have a way with words and you made me smile. Wishing you love joy and happiness in your new home.
ReplyDeleteI hate when I can't find what I need at the grocery store. And I find every Shop-Rite to be weird in some way, and each one in a different way. I sort of hate Shop-Rite. OK, I really hate Shop-Rite. All of them. But they do have good prices.
ReplyDeleteHope your kitchen gets doe soon and you can feel more settled!
I hate going to the grocery store and I can never find anything, which is exactly how I get out of going. Let's keep this secret between you and me.
ReplyDeleteI agree with Bill! Sounds like a great strategy. Unfortunately my husband is employing the "I just forgot we needed that" strategy, so it's been a tie so far. It's so frustrating, isn't it? One time I couldn't find the bread and I had the same kind of internal shout: "What kind of grocery store doesn't sell BREAD???"
DeleteMoving is so strange. I always think, 'okay, this is going to be my grocery store now. This is going to be my drug store." It's both a good and bad feeling. We get so engrained in our habits, that it's hard when someone moves our cheese!
ReplyDeleteI so related to this post, because I cannot stand it when I can't find what I need at the store. Well done.
ReplyDeleteThe market where I shop is notorious for moving things particularly the shallots. I use them ALOT and every time I go in, I have to ask them way they keep moving. Almost like the book "Who Moved My Cheese". No one knows. Glad you found yours. Happy thanksgiving!
ReplyDeleteHaha! I thought of that book, too! Of all the grocery store crimes in the world, hiding the cheese has to top the list! Way to soldier on in the face of cheese adversity.
DeleteThis is so funny. I love your lines of internal dialogue -- how you start out calm to "WHERE THE HELL IS THE GODDAMNED CHEESE?" Glad you found the cheese!
ReplyDeleteCheese IS so important. And I feel just the way you do... if my kitchen is out of commission for any reason, it throws off my whole mood.
ReplyDeleteThis reminds me of the book "You moved my cheese." It's about change. You might like it!
ReplyDeleteOh how I wish I had a love for cooking. It would make life so much simpler.
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I feel you, sister. A life without cheese? Inconceivable.
ReplyDeleteVery funny post. I'm so glad you are liking your new town.
Hah. Isn't it crazy how we panic like that when we are in an unfamiliar place? As if the store wouldn't carry cheese. But yes, the thought crosses the mind in that moment. Glad you found it!
ReplyDeleteSamantha, this is one of your funniest posts, no doubt. I love your Manhattan-to-suburbs perspective and look forward to more of it.
ReplyDeleteThat's one reason I don't like to shop at an unfamiliar grocery store, especially when I'm in a hurry! I always need to know where the cheese is! ;)
ReplyDelete